The other day I installed some coat hooks on the wall in the front entryway of my house. I got to play around with a power drill, a stud finder, a level and a tape measure; I figured it all out on my own and the results look pretty good. A few years ago, when I was in denial and trying very hard to be male, this sort of accomplishment would have made me feel like Yeah, I'm a man, gettin' stuff done. Now that identify as mostly female, it made me feel like Yeah, I'm an independent woman, I don't need a man around to do stuff for me.It's telling (and kind of funny) that the exact same activity could have a completely different gendered significance in my mind. A woman using power tools is exerting her independence; a man doing the same thing is just being a man. That, I'm sure, is a reflection of the culture I grew up in.
On an unrelated note, I think I've decided to wait until I find a job to start electrolysis, just because I would hate to start and then have to stop again for lack of funds. I'm not super thrilled about this descision, but I'm pretty sure it's what makes the most sense.
What other people think something means has become less important it seems. At least that has been my own shift, feeling exactly as you have said. At one time I was desperate to maintain the façade of maleness, and yes, in my mind being a DIY sort was some sort of proof. Now, I am simply using skills and ingenuity to accomplish some task. That others have the nerve to suggest I wouldn't be able or interested in doing this if my body had come out female is their issue.
ReplyDeleteThere is no good time for economic downturn, but this one in Alberta has come at a really bad time for you. It makes sense to conserve resources. Stay strong Hon.
Thanks Halle :)
DeleteHi Ashley!
ReplyDeleteAs someone who has always been utterly hopeless with tools of any sort, but particularly power tools, I tip my hat in your direction. :)
I'm sorry you have to delay starting electrolysis. I know how frustrating it is to have to wait when you are more than ready to begin. Here's hoping that you can begin as soon as possible, hon.
Hugs,
Cass
Hi Ashley!!
ReplyDeleteThis is a very interesting perspective to have. It actually makes me think of the things that've happened since we moved to our house. When I'm using my new tools, building stuff or fixing stuff, I get the sense that's my male side getting things accomplished. It most likely represents how I view myself in the middle of the gender spectrum, seeing myself as doing masculine and feminine things. I wonder it that perspective will change or not, as I know that working with tools is generally instilled into us, by society, as a masculine activity. Time will tell,
Much love,
Katie